rasa rindu yg sgt rindu.

pernah rindu, rindu sgt sampai nangis?
aku baru je.
everytime teringatkan arwah atuk, rindu, sampai nangis.
satu je aku doa pd Allah... I want to see him in my dream.

I want to talk to him. mengadu and share ttg setiap yg tak sempat aku share.
I want to see his face.
I want to hear his voice...kata2 nasihat dia, lenggok bahasanya yg lembut tp tegas.

rindu semua tu.
Tp doa tu tak pernah makbul since aku start doa in 1997.
kenapa ek?

mcm mana nak let go feelings ni.
redha...mmg dah lama redha yg dia dah takde.
tp rindu sgt.
bila rindu tu dtg, rasa susah nak handle...kt mana2 pun bole nangis.

Maybe sbb I wasn't ready masa dia pergi.
Tak sangka langsung dia akan pergi secepat tu.
I wasnt been informed pun masa dia sakit kat hospital.
Tiba2, masa dlm class statistic, org dtg bgtau ada phone call kat admin ofc.
And tat was it. I heard dad was crying telling me atuk was no longer with us.
Dunia gelap tiba2.
aku hope sgt semua tu mimpi or it was a joke.
but it wasn't.

Skali lagi aku berdoa smoga atuk dtg dlm mimpi.
Ya Allah perkenankan lah doa hari Jumaat ni.
Amin.